Chain Up This Melody

This afternoon in a fit of post-lunchtime excitement I decided to watch some "music TV" as it's called, and dreadful was not the word - endless repeats of dreary videos (Robson and Fucking Jerome NOOOO!) interrupted by an advert for a rather dire version of "I Touch Myself" by some bunch of girlies who were about 4 when the original version (Divinyls) was out and about. Now I like cover versions, especially those which have either a certain dreadful quality about them (How Soon Is Now by tatu) or which are seriously pimped out (I Touch Myself by the Genitorturers) but this is something which should not have been allowed out of the studio - Kate Bush warned us about this sort of thing in Experiment IV

"But they told us all they wanted was a sound
That could kill someone from a distance
So we go ahead and
The meters are over in the red
It's a mistake we have made

Uuh, uuh, uuh, uuh
And the public are warned to stay off"