Categorically Speaking

Categories are quite a useful thing in the right context, after all you wouldn't be exactly delighted if you went to the library and found that the books had all been put on the 'B for Books' shelf, now would you?
Now turn to music, I mean how many different genres and sub-genres do we really need? How useful is it when at the end of the day? We only ever use two categories for music - what we like and what we don't - end of. (Whoops sorry I forgot there's a third category - "The Blissets")
Therefore there must be some kind of conspiracy on the part of the music media to promote these - and I blame (fanfare, fireworks and Dancing Girls please Mister Squeaky) Kerrang!
So what's so wrong about it? Well for a start I don't believe that Finnish Symphonic Goth Metal is a genuine category - indeed I can only think of one band that fit this description (Nightwish in case you couldn't guess) so why not just use their name? Secondly having seen the band twice the only thing vaguely Gothic about them was a proportion of the audience - the band are far way more metal so why not call them Symphonic Metal Goth (or as some people would have it Symphonic Moth) After all there are genuine Finnish Goth bands out there (Two Witches for example)
Then we get on to other inexplicable categories - take extreme black metal as a case in point - well how extreme is extreme - do we only consider bands who have burned down churches and assaulted non-satanists, or ones who have incredible blastbeats which can only be accomplished by four-footed drummers (probably a side effect of being in league with satan, but you never know...)
Well now that's off my chest I'm going to listen to some industrial metal darkwave electrogoth crossover (The Chaos Engine in case you wondered)