Just returned from Asda - decided that as the Iron Maiden fan club have demanded that the shop be boycotted following Sharon Osbourne (allegedly) pelting the band with eggs during Ozzfest it must be worth going to. And I was right. Why? They sell Jägermeister. (Hint Mister Corporate Sponsorship guy!) But on one thing I was sadly disappointed, the television ad suggests that it's full of people spanking themselves and there was no corporal punishment in sight. That's right no whips or other devices for self-flagellation and I looked carefully. Twice. No smouldering boots of punishment, or for that matter pilnie-winkies (thumb, finger and toe screws to you - uneducated rabble) on any of the shelves, and I just couldn't find an aisle for sado-masochism - although decorated cakes came a very close second.
Anyway, back to the plot, the shelves were groaning under the weight of halloween novelties - now this I like as sparkly tinsel bats have a certain appeal and as it relates to my birthday (yes, it's true I was born on Samhain and yes it does explain an awful lot) there should be more done to raise public awareness and get a grateful nation to buy me a really really big prezzie. (Hint No 2 Mister Corporate Sponsorship - a vat of absinthe or Jäger please)
So there I am happy in the supermarket for once - all thanks to Sharon Osbourne and I never thought I'd say that.
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