Hollywood Dreams

There are many things that I find utterly without appeal, and some of them are verging on the truly horrific and macabre. Take for example "The Sound of Music." Not big not clever. Singing nuns escaping from Nazi occupied Europe with a flock of snot nosed spoiled brats whilst trilling away about hills being full of music and kittens being something wonderful instead of being little fur coats covered with razor blades and full of extreme feline malevolence. Not something I find particularly uplifting.
But then that's the whole cinema experience for you. Pay some hugh some of money to sit in a darkened box with your knees crammed up by your ears because the seats are designed for pigmies with eating disorders. The endless noise from inconsiderate fools who are unable to turn their mobile phones off and have to give their mates (presumably in the next box in the multiplex) a blow by blow account of the less than adequate plot of the film, the super noisy comestibles that the fat bastard sitting behind you has to continually munch through the film, the only wonder being how they ever managed to shoehorn him into the tiny seats. And then finally the film, the trailers promise all kinds of cinema magic, amazing special effects and really good acting. And how disappointing the reality is.
Take for example Van Helsing, Mr Squeaky's least favourite film. Totally crap plot, vampire hunter wins after becoming werewolf and destroying Dracula and I'm sure it's some kind of allegory for the "War on Terror". No way mate! What should happen is that Dracula and his brides overcome the power of good and feed the children of the night with the blood of their innocent victims.
And people wonder why I don't go to the cinema very often....