It seems that I've been a little bit unfair on drummers of late - cursing them for being hideously ugly and having to hide amongst their paraphernalia (that's stuff btw LHM, not leaflets) having bizarre religions (Phil Collins is not the messiah - he's just a very bald boy) or having more feet than you strictly need to walk upright with. So by the powers of Greyskull I've declared tomorrow national be nice to drummers day.
Instead I'm going to pick on a different sort of musician...and it's tuba players. Why? Because I have one living in the same flats as myself and I've just been startled by some very deep notes which have made me think that there must be fog on the Thames and have rattled the windows. So what is the precise purpose of a hugh amount of metal made into the shape of a Salvador Dali spittoon other than to cause people in the immediate vicinity some gastrointestinal discomfort? How often do you hear of a piece of music being specifically written for the instrument in question? Why is it associated with beer swilling leather short wearing Nazi thugs from Munich who have a profound sense of destiny which involves marching through Poland?
I think the possession of one of these ghastly instruments should be grounds for an immediate ASBO and the confiscation of all wealth...just as well I don't live near a bagpiper isn't it?
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