Breakfast with Natasha

Having to work early shifts this week. Not fun in any way whatsoever. It has, however, given me the opportunity to see the world of breakfast television. What is the purpose?
For a start the presenters are decidedly unworldly looking - Immaculately groomed, so awake it looks as though they've consumed enough amphetamines to keep half of Beijing awake for a month. Surely half asleep people with their hair astray absent mindedly buttering the newspaper would be more like what goes on in the real world.
Now I ask you, who on earth is at their best first thing in the morning, I'm certainly not and looking sharp is not something that happens until much much later in the day - around about 11 pm usually. So how does Natasha do it, or do they keep her overnight in suspended animation? Is she in human or something left over from the last series of Doctor Who?
And as for the constant news updates - give me strength - I don't need detailed on the spot analysis of some crisis far away in a country I've never heard of and can't find on an atlas, just tell me what the weather's going to do and what hold-ups there are for the traffic, I'll deal with reality when I'm awake, well I'll try to anyway.